The Missing Ingredient…Love

(Originally written, April 1997)

There is one thing that any man or woman will give their life for.  It eventually will be more important than food, water, security, possessions, popularity, power, and all the pleasures that this society affords.  Babies have strangely died for lack of it even when physical nourishment was present.  Senior citizens have given up their reason for living when they were unable to attract what they were desperately seeking.  Fragile teenagers despair of life without this necessary provision.  It is counterfeited, sold, falsely promised, pursued, and chased after at every turn.  It is confused with feelings, atmosphere, activity, manipulation, finances, success, and even sex.  It is available all around us, but we can’t see it.  We see the results of it and only are able to experience the real thing if we are perceptive and patient.  Each one of us lives each day of our lives pursuing true “love”.

The grandchild, the young son, the struggling busy father, the unconfident mother, the confused teenager, and the retired grandparent all desperately want to be loved, needed, accepted, and appreciated.  In the workplace, the employee, manager, and even the employer look for approval.  The politician craves it, the entertainers must have it, and the pastor needs it to keep going.  Sometimes, we are so busy manipulating others to gain an ounce of love that we miss many opportunities to use it to encourage all those that we encounter.  We long to be needed, respected, treasured, complimented, and treated with courtesy by those around us.  We particularly desire the approval of a parent, a teacher, or a mentor.  We want to be accepted by our peers, to be remembered by the masses, and to be served by even our best friends.  We each have a “hole” that can only be filled by love, and no amount can ever seem to satisfy its longings.

The answer to our lifelong dilemma is fairly simple:

  1. In order to get the love that we need, we must give away all of it that we have.  We must focus on others, serve their needs, and unselfishly forget about ourselves.  We must mentally, emotionally, and physically seek to make others successful.  Only in giving it away will we ever be able to receive it at a later date.
  2. Secondly, we must realize that even if we receive love in return, it can never satisfy desire for fulfillment.  We can never be loved or served too much, too deeply, or too often.  It fuels us mightily, but must be replenished often.
  3. Eventually, we must understand that the source of all love is God Himself.  He not only allows us to serve and show our love to others, but He completely fills our own longings.

Richard Halverson reminds us that, “God’s love is available to all who will receive it.  It is unchanging, universal, infinite, eternal, unlimited, personal, impartial, and amazingly unconditional.  We can not earn it, even with a supreme effort, but we can reject it.  Even though we don’t deserve it, He offers His perfect love to us.  We can not avoid facing His love, but must either respond to it, ignore it, or refuse it.”

God’s love was demonstrated to us by the Father’s gift of His only Son. It was modeled for us by the Son’s willing sacrificial death and is available to us through the presence of His Holy Spirit.  Faith is mandatory for direction, hope is imperative for survival, but only love will cure the bankruptcy of our soul.  Life without God’s love leads only to frustration, futility, and failure.  So seek love!

Making myself at home –

In God’s Love,

 “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”     1 Corinthians 13:12 (NIV)


About kenthumphreys
Kent Humphreys has been a business leader for over forty years. He also served as CEO of FCCI/Christ@Work for six years and now serves as their worldwide ambassador, speaking, writing, and mentoring young leaders. He continues to be active in distribution, private equities, and real estate. Kent and his wife Davidene have written six books together. They have three children and eight grand-children.

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